Crack Mashed Potatoes

There is nothing subtle or boring about these crack mashed potatoes. I would go so far as to say that these are the best I have ever made. With the three main addictive ingredients: bacon, cheddar cheese, and ranch, it is hard not to love this side dish. It also has two different kinds of cream, warm milk, softened butter, garlic, and onion, making these potatoes even more delicious. Then, they are topped with some extra cheese, bacon, and chopped green onions.

Crack Mashed Potatoes are in demand in my family. Whenever we have potlucks, they tease me to prepare this! So, I guess, they are just as addicted to this side dish as I am! Once you have tried this recipe, you will know these are the best mashed potatoes. You do not need to go back to those fancy twice-baked potato recipes with fried onions, five kinds of cheese, and layers of different kinds of vegetables. This easy recipe takes about 30-40 minutes, and you only need a handful of ingredients.

The name itself tells you how addictive they are, so you may want to make a double or triple batch. If you cannot finish them all, they can be stored in the fridge for several days or in the freezer for a few months. This dish is perfect for holidays and celebrations, but it is also great just for serving the family any night of the week. But remember, once they try it, they will want you to make it often.

This is an excellent make-ahead recipe for snacks and meals. Whether planning for yourself or the whole family, you can put an ice cream scoop into freezer bags or containers. Then, place them into the freezer with the dates on them. However, remember to thaw them in the fridge the night before. I am a fan of this side dish! I like making it whenever we have dishes that have gravy such as the cube steak, and instant pot pot roast.

Why you will love this recipe

• The magic trio: With ranch, bacon, and cheddar, these potatoes are addictive.
• Fast and easy: Takes less than 30 minutes and anyone can do it.
• A handful of ingredients: You only need a few ingredients besides the potatoes and dairy.
• Stores well: You can store easily for a week or longer.

What you’ll need to make crack mashed potatoes

Special items:

• Saucepan – For boiling potatoes.
• Colander – To drain potatoes.
• Potato masher – For mashing potatoes.
• Hand mixer – To fluff potatoes (only a little if needed).
• Utensils

Ingredients:

• Potatoes – I use russets for soft and fluffy mashed potatoes that absorb other ingredients for more flavor.
• Warm milk – Warm milk is more easily absorbed with less stirring and extra creaminess.
• Warm cream – I also like to add heavy cream (also warm) for thicker potatoes.
• Sour cream – Sour cream gives your mashed potatoes a tangy flavor and even more creaminess. Make sure it is warmed to room temperature.
• Unsalted butter – Ensure it is softened to room temperature for easier incorporation.
• Cheddar cheese – Shred your cheddar cheese from a block for the best meltability and freshest taste.
• Bacon – I used 12 slices of bacon, freshly cooked and chopped.
• Ranch seasoning – Try my easy-to-make ranch seasoning mix. It adds amazing flavor to these potatoes.
• Garlic powder – Powder is for convenience. You can use minced garlic for a fresh and vibrant taste.
• Onion powder – Same here. If you have the time, use minced onion for more flavor.
• Salt
• Pepper
• Fresh green onions – Chop some green onions and sprinkle them on top right before serving for extra color and flavor.
• Cheddar cheese – Toss some on while it the potatoes are still warm so it melts.
• Bacon – Crumbled on top before serving for extra crunch and more color.

How to make crack mashed potatoes?

1. Peel and boil: First, peel and cut potatoes into quarters. Remove any knots, lumps, or spots. Please place them in a large pot (at least six quarts) and cover them with cold salted water by at least an inch. Please bring it to a boil, then reduce the heat to medium-low and let it simmer, stirring occasionally, until fork-tender, about 15 to 20 minutes.
2. Drain potatoes: Next, drain the potatoes completely, ensuring all excess water is gone. Wipe out the pot and add the potatoes back before adding the hot milk, cream, sour cream, butter, onion powder, garlic powder, ranch, salt, and pepper.
3. Mix and mash: Now, mash the potatoes with a potato masher until smooth, adding a little bit more of the cream or milk if needed. You can use a hand mixer to make them fluffy now if you like, but be careful not to overbeat them. Then, add bacon and cheese before stirring to combine.
4. Garnish and serve: Finally, garnish with more cheese, butter, chopped bacon, and green onions before serving.

Expert tip

How do I choose the best potatoes?

I buy organic potatoes from the farmers’ market so I can get my hands on them to see how they feel, smell, and look up close. Look for clean and firm potatoes with smooth and dry skin without any bruises, spots, or cuts. The color should be right for the type of potato you are buying. Look for sprouting eyes. I do not usually mind them if there is one or two, and the rest of the potato looks excellent. Dirt is fine. After all, they come out of the ground.

They should smell like the earth. However, they should not smell moldy or musty. If they smell bad or old, they probably are. You also do not want them to smell like pesticides or chemicals of any kind. That is a red flag for me. Next, check how they feel. They should be smooth with no soft spots. Squeeze them to see if they are firm. They should not be soft or squishy. Soft potatoes are going bad.

Once you get them home, store your potatoes in a well-ventilated area between 50 and 60 degrees F. Keeping them colder, like in the fridge, will cause them to discolor and turn the starch to sugar. Keeping them by a large appliance or another warm area will cause them to grow and get moldy. You should keep them in a paper bag or a perforated plastic bag in the dark, and do not wash them.

Recipe variations and add-ins:

• Add ham: In addition to the bacon, you can toss in some chopped ham.
• More veggies: Chop bell peppers, mushrooms, celery, and zucchini for more heartiness without more meat.
• Extra cheese: Along with the cheddar, mozzarella, Swiss, or pepper jack would be great too.
• Spicy spuds: Anyone who enjoys spicy food will love a bit of cayenne pepper or some chopped jalapenos in the mix.
• Thicker potatoes: Instead of sour cream, use cream cheese for thicker mashed potatoes.

Serving suggestions:

This is an excellent side dish for so many entrees. I have some great ideas for you here.

• These mashed potatoes go great with burgers, but they go even better with my bacon cheeseburger sloppy joes.
• You could serve these with this baked crack chicken to keep things going on the same theme. It is so amazing with cheddar, bacon, and ranch.
• Creamy garlic pork chops would go hand in hand with mashed bacon cheddar ranch potatoes. All that creamy goodness getting soaked into the potatoes is amazing.
• Try these with beef tips and gravy or this juicy slow cooker meatloaf.
• With such an addictive side dish, you must have a special dessert. Anything chocolate, from chocolate brownies to ice cream, will work for me.
• Try a buttery Chardonnay or white Zinfandel with this delicious dish and whatever you serve with it.

Frequently asked questions

How do you keep mashed potatoes warm?

Keeping them in a bain-marie (water bath) with a lid will stay warm for hours without any sticky layer or hard skin on top. It is simple to do. Just get a larger pot or pan your mashed potato pot can fit into and fill it with an inch of water. Bring the water to a simmer on the stove and place your covered pot of mashed potatoes inside that pot. Leave it in the simmering water if you need your potatoes to stay warm. Just keep it on low and make sure the water does not evaporate.

Why are my potatoes gluey and gummy?

It can happen if you overwork or overcook your potatoes. When you overwork them, too much starch is released into the potato mixture, and it will cause a gummy and gluey paste that is unappetizing. Overcooking causes the cells to separate, and gelatinized starch leaks out. This can also be caused by using waxy potatoes. So, use a potato masher, only cook them until they are fork-tender, and use russet potatoes.

Do I have to wash my potatoes first?

Absolutely. If for nothing else but to remove dirt, bacteria, and pesticides, the CDC recommends you wash your hands with soap and water and then scrub them with a vegetable brush under cool running water. Stubborn spots should be soaked for five minutes. Then, dry and rinse again to make sure you got it all. After washing, drying, and rinsing, you need to soak them for about 15 minutes to get rid of excess starch. Then, rinse them again.

What are the best potatoes for mashed potatoes?

I prefer russet potatoes, but I also use Yukon Gold sometimes and prefer to mix them sometimes. I have heard many times that using a mixture of russet and Yukon Gold potatoes makes your potatoes more interesting, rich and creamy, fluffy and light. The Yukons are dense and thick, while the russets are light and airy. But russets have a low moisture content, so they absorb dairy products better, so milk, cream, and butter are more pronounced. 

How to store leftovers:

• Refrigerate: Store in the fridge for three days in an airtight container. 
• Freezing: Leftovers can also be frozen for up to three months in a freezer-safe container. For convenience, save single-serving portion scoops in freezer bags to take out as needed. 
• Defrost: Thaw overnight in your refrigerator for the best texture and taste.
• Reheating: The best way to reheat is on the stove. You may add some cream or milk as you go, a little at a time.    

More recipes with potatoes:

Recipe tips:

• Adding warm milk and cream to your potatoes makes them creamier.
• All ingredients should be at room temperature or warm.
• Russet potatoes are best for mashed potatoes because they are fluffy and absorb ingredients better.
• Do not overmash or overwork your potatoes, or they will be gummy. Just use a potato masher. You can use a mixer for a short time to make them fluffiness, but be careful not to overmix them.
• Do not overcook them for the same reason. Overcooking causes starch to leak out, which in turn leads to gluey and gummy potatoes.
• Scrubbing and washing your potatoes first will clean away the dirt, bacteria, and pesticides.
• You should also soak them for 15 minutes and rinse them again to remove excess starch.
• To keep your potatoes warm after cooking them, put them into a large pot with an inch of simmering water and keep them covered. Just make sure the water does not evaporate and they will stay soft and warm.